If you’re going out on a date with a woman, dress like a man.
Dress in a manner that she understands you take her seriously, that this date could lead to the biggest commitment of your lives. Because it just might.
Every married man can tell you that the relationship with his wife started somewhere — that there was a point when he decided to take a chance with this woman and see if they were compatible for the long run.
Note: this isn’t an article about how to dress when you’re hanging out with or meeting with a group of female friends.
The focus here is how to properly present yourself to a woman that could very well be your life partner.
Why dress sharp on a first date?
1. Physical attraction matters — Simply put, women care about appearances and are drawn to healthy, attractive looking men. Clothing covers 90% of your body — if worn correctly it can help you look better by strengthening your positive features and minimizing your less than attractive ones.
2. Dressing sharp for another shows respect — You can’t control whether the woman you’ll be meeting will like your personality; you can, however, make a conscious decision to take the time to look your best. She’ll be spending a lot of time making sure she is presentable and dressed for a fun time — the least you can do is return the favor. It’s simply a matter of treating another human being as you would like to be treated.
3. Dressing well indicates you have social skills, as it makes socializing easier — Women look at not only the way we interact with them, but the way we interact with others. Our ability to socialize is an indicator of our ability (or inability) to negotiate in a community where resources are scarce. When you meet her friends or family, is the impression positive? With little else to go by, your appearance is going to play a larger role than normal. By looking sharp and simply smiling and nodding politely, you’ll be amazed at how most people will form a positive impression.
4. Dressing sharp puts you in the right state of mind — When you wear a uniform, whether it be for sport or work, the clothing helps you focus on the task at hand. The same thing is true when you prepare and dress sharp for a date — from the shower and grooming to making sure your clothing is clean and in good order, getting ready is a time for reflection on what you’re about to get yourself into. Give yourself the time to prepare, and wear clothing you’re confident in. You’ll find these two preparation steps get your date off on the right foot.
5. It brings your face into focus — Wearing the right clothing keeps your date’s attention on your face. Like a well-proportioned picture frame it shouldn’t overpower or detract from its purpose of placing you in the best light. Avoid flashy accessories or clothing that will draw too much attention to itself — this is a date, not a fashion show.
6. The right clothing can exaggerate healthy masculine traits — Clothing like a sports jacket can exaggerate masculine features such as square lines in the face, broad shoulders, muscular chest, smaller stomach than upper torso.
These are all things women are subconsciously attracted to — they signal a healthy level of testosterone. Although not the sole factor a woman should choose a husband on — it’s nice to start off on the right foot. An important point to note is that most of the time we judge attractiveness in a moving environment.
We can spot a woman from a considerable distance by the way she moves her hips as she walks — we are attracted to this. In the same way women can spot a man based off the way he naturally moves his shoulders and arms. This is important as you’re sending a positive message of health before your face comes into focus.
7. Your date is sizing you up — On a first date, both parties are looking each other over, searching for clues about their date’s personality and long-term potential. You only have a few hours together, so these clues will not only come from your conversation, but your non-verbal behavior as well. It’s all well and good to say you want your date to like you for you, but how will she ever get to know you if she turns down a second date? Be sure that how you dress sends the right signals and not only shows respect but reveals your personality.
Specific Dressing Guidelines
Casual dates, especially outdoor ones, allow a relaxed outfit but not a sloppy one. Even if you’re going to be engaged in a sporting activity, wear a respectable outfit that isn’t tattered or dated. Stay away from clothes that make it seem like you didn’t put any effort into dressing — plain blue jeans or work clothes look bad, as do sweatpants or athletic pants (unless it’s a jogging date).
Dark-wash jeans in black or deep indigo strike a nice balance and can be paired with anything from a short-sleeved collared shirt to a dress shirt and sports jacket. Tuck in your shirt (unless your date is in Ocean Beach) and match a casual leather belt with a pair of similarly colored leather shoes. And leave the running shoes for when you are running.
Dinners dates and other evening events in an urban setting usually mean you should wear a jacket. For evenings or events that do not require a suit, look to a blazer jacket; if you’re going to be out during the day and want something more casual, a sport jacket is always a flattering option.
And enough with the nonsense that you’ll be the only man wearing one — a jacket has time and time again been shown to help men look more masculine and authoritative. Plus, it provides ample pockets for carrying your first date supplies. If it gets too hot or you find the situation is more casual than expected, you can always discreetly take it off.
Event dates at a city theater or concert hall are a great way to ensure the clothing required is understood. Although you’ll be dressed-up for the occasion, there is less risk your date will be turned off by your appearance. Dust off a good suit and wear a clean, well-pressed shirt and tie. You can always slip the tie off when you go for drinks afterwards if it seems a little too stuffy.
No matter how informal the date is, pay attention to your shoes — Whether you are wearing canvas sneakers for your walking tour around San Francisco or dress loafers for your dinner at Truluck’s in Austin — you can bet she’ll look to see what you’re wearing. Shoes say a lot about you and are one of those aforementioned clues to your personality that your date will check out. Ensure your footwear is clean, functional, and stylish.